Jet-skier killed by swimmer

17th Jul 2005, 11:00 pm

The body of a jet-skier was recovered from the beach at Brighton late yesterday after a tragic accident involving a 'swimmer'.

It is thought to be the first such incident, and is being blamed on the rising popularity of 'swimming' as a passtime. "It was only a matter of time before something like this happened" said local Coast Guard commander Jeremy Andrews, who recovered the badly injured corpse.

"It was shocking, the head was almost completely severed from the torso" Andrews said.

Police told reporters how the tragic events unfolded. "On the afternoon of the accident the beach had been especially crowded with 'swimmers', as they call themselves, and it's believed there may have been some tension between them and the traditional jet-skiers, all vying for space on the water."

Swimmer in the sea
A typical 'swimmer'.

"The jet skier is thought to have politely asked the swimmer to move aside, whereupon he was brutally mowed down, his head being savagely beaten by the flailing arms of a butterfly stroke. The swimmer may never even have seen his victim, but the sheer calous disregard for other water users means we are treating this as a murder investigation."

There have been repeated calls for swimming to be banned from beaches, or allowed only in specially designated areas marked out by bouys. Almost all parties agree that butterfly stroke in particular requires special measures to ensure the safety of innocent jet-skiers and speedboat users.

The police want to speak to a fit-looking white male in his mid-fifties, tanned, wearing very small trunks.

 

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